Ok , there's this guy . & If he wants me I'm all his . That's how I feel about this certain one . He's like my First Love . I understand older people ask , "How Could You Know What Love Is" or say , "Your Too Young To Be In Love . " But I believe that love has no age or however you say it . Anyhow , my closest friends say that he's no good , & they don't like me liking him but I say , they couldn't say such a thing , because they only know one side of the story . I mean , they don't understand because they can't see it through my eyes & they don't see what I'm going through but this is besides the point I guess I can say .

This boy , we'll call him J . He's actually my ex-boyfriend . But he's different from all the rest . He's the only one who's ever made me truly happy through it all . But somewhere I guess I went wrong . I tend to take things for granted and don't realize what I have until it's actually gone . I'm so in love with this boy and I want him back . It's kinda like we've moved on , but not really , or maybe we just don't want to admit it . But getting to the point , J knows how much I like him and that I am in love with him & I feel as if he's taking it to his advantage trying to use me . It seems like each time I try and forget him , delete his number , or maybe move on , he always finds his way back . Little does he know , I have my sources . He has a girlfriend , they actually got together like 3 days after we broke up . Which means , he had to be talking to her all the while we were together . & I actually found out that they'd been talking since Christmas Break when school was in and we were together way before that . But for some reason , I still want him .

Anywhom , whenever he comes back to me or whatever you want to call it . It seems as if he always wants something . He asks me for money , to do his homework , and even went as far asking me to send him pictures of my body and all the while I'm just like WTF . & my answer always happens to be no , or why ? & He always replies , If You Loved Me You Would . But constantly I'm like no , this actually has nothing to do with love and I feel as if i'm being used or whatever . But I just don't get it . Why can't he ask his girlfriend for such things even though some are too far out and just not right but still . & He constantly lies to me , saying he's single or whatever but I just don't buy it . And when I say no , he always does this mood swing telling me to lose his number & don't talk to him , call him , text him or nothing [like i actually do those things anyway] but he's the one always coming back to me .

I'm just so confused about everything . Yes , he makes me sad but yet and still for some reason I could wake up the next day and just be all happy and still want him . I realize that I deserve better and he's bad news , but those are just always the ones that we're attracted to . & This last time , he told me that he does some stuff out of anger and he really likes me , and wants me to be his but I play to many games and stuff . And it just always comes into my mind , WTF . I just don't know . None of this may not make any sense because my thoughts aren't all together but I just need to hear the thought of others .



[ ? ]

Have You Ever Been In Love ?

Is There Just Anyone Who Confuses The Heck Out Of You ?

What's Your Favorite Book ?

0 Comments