last year during the season premiere of 90210 , i simply remember one of the character saying tht the best cure for a break-up is a hook-up . at first i was like yeah right , this is just TV..simply entertainment but now i seem to find it to be so true . as my last blog obvisouly showed i was sprung over this one boy but now tht someone else came around , tht i actually have interest in he takes my mind completely away from all my thoughts , wonders , wishes , & all from J and i can now honestly say tht i'm done with him . over him actually , at least tht's what i believe for now . i can't tell what would happen if we encounter one another again but until then , forget him . he put me through a lot of heartbreak and pain and now i don't want it anymore because i do indeed deserve better .

anywhom , to the point i guess . idk what is is but it seems like all these boys want me for whatever reason but at the time when all of this starting happening i only wanted one boy but couldn't have him & he obviously wasn't one of the ones tht was paying all his attention to me . so i heard tht one thing tht boys hate or dislike if for girls to lead them on . so all these boys are tryna get my undivided attention and for some reason it's like i don't like to reject people or put them down or something . idk how to describe it but just say i might end of up talking to these boys anyway knowing deep down i don't want them no way but i really don't tend to lead them on but they may think so or whatever , idk my thoughts aren't all together on this but getting to the title .


dilemma - a difficulty in choosing between options


so they're these two boys . & they both got my attention . one of them , T , i'm really feeling him . he use to go to my school , actually he does still play sports for us b/c his school doesn't offer them and often visits and whatnot . but , he has the reputation , i'd rather not state it just yet but if you wanna know just ask . but we have this mutual friend , & i asked about this little reputation of us and he told me he told him to slow down and tht some girls are just young and dummm and i don't categorize myself as this . but anyhow , i found myself to like him and he likes me to , so he says but it's like i want to go with him but some part of me is scared . i just feel like i'm not one his level , him being 2 years older than me or whatever . & i know he would wanna take me out , go the movies or whatever and i'm not in a good situation where i can do all tht with him just yet & idk . like i said , i just feel as if i'm not on his level .

then there's this other boy , M . i went to middle school with him , & he just so happens to be my boy bestfriend's bestfriend . like he'll be over our mutual friend's house , which is next door to me . during christmas time we all went to the mall together and tht's where it all started and as time went by we began to like each other . & our bestfriend's grandma , mother , & himself seem to think i liked M . they actually all thought tht before i really did like him . but it's like if i go with him i wouldn't want them to find out b/c then they wouldn't constantly be in our business , our WHOLE familes would not and tht just not how i want things to do .

really i don't know what to do , don't know what i want to do . if i went with one what would i do about the other . so i really have a big dilemma , so i think so . then there's the option of staying single , but then they might lose interest and think tht i was leading them on . it's really just a big mess on my behalf .


[ questions ] .

wht are your views on cheating ?

wht are your plans for summmer , or how's it going ?

* looking for people to add to my blogrolll . if your interested tell me in a comment !

0 Comments